Rebuilding Your Life After Domestic Violence

After experiencing domestic violence, it can be not easy to trust yourself or anyone else. You may feel like you’re constantly second-guessing your decisions and that you’ll never be able to move on from what happened. It’s important to remember that you are not alone and help is available.

Trust is Essential

Trusting yourself allows you to feel confident and capable. However, trust is often hard-won and easily lost. If you struggle to trust yourself, it is important to remember that trust is earned through consistent actions and words. Every time you make a promise to yourself and keep it, or follow through on a goal, no matter how small, you are rebuilding trust. The key is to be patient and persistent; trust takes time to develop, but it is always worth the effort. So if you find yourself doubting your abilities, take a deep breath and remind yourself that trust is something you can always choose to rebuild.

Dealing with the shame and guilt

Dealing with the shame and guilt of domestic violence can be very difficult. Remember that it is not your fault and that you are not alone. Many people have gone through what you’re going through and have come out the other side. You can too.

Anyone who has ever made a mistake knows the feeling of shame that comes with it. That sense of inadequacy, of not measuring up, can be very painful. For some people, those feelings are so overwhelming that they never attempt anything new for fear of making another mistake.

However, it is essential to remember that everyone makes mistakes. It is part of being human. What is important is not to dwell on past failures but to learn from them and move on. For domestic violence survivors, this can be especially difficult. They may feel ashamed of what happened or feel like they could have done something to prevent it.

Domestic violence survivors need to realise that they are not responsible for the abuse.

This realisation will not happen overnight but can over time. No one deserves to be abused. No one “asks for it.” It is never the victim’s fault.

Dealing with the trauma 

Abusive relationships can leave deep psychological scars. The trauma of being subjected to domestic violence can cause long-term damage to a person’s mental and emotional health.

Healing from the trauma of an abusive relationship is a long and challenging process, but it is possible with the right help and support. Therapists who specialise in domestic violence survivors can provide the guidance and tools necessary for starting the healing process. With time and effort, survivors of domestic violence can begin to rebuild their lives and find hope for the future.

There is no one “right” way to rebuild your life after domestic violence. Take things one day at a time and focus on taking care of yourself. Seek out support from friends, family, or a support group for survivors of domestic violence. When you’re ready, start making decisions about your future. You will get through this, and you will be able to create the life you want for yourself.

Jamie Treasure

Jamie Treasure has joined the Startpoint Counselling Team as a Post Domestic Violence Counsellor. You can book a 15-minute complimentary phone call with Jamie to see how she can assist you in rebuilding your life after domestic violence.

Appointments with Jamie are available in person, via video link and phone.